Your Grief Counselor in Phoenix
People keep telling me that it's been too long and I should seek help.
But I'm not sure what I need.
I am sorry for your loss and thankful that you are here. Your family, friends, and coworkers may tell you that your grief has been going on long enough, that you need to move on, and that something may be wrong with you. They may be trying to be helpful, they may feel uncomfortable around your hurt, but the things they say and do are damaging.
You are experiencing pain beyond what you knew was possible, you keep wishing you had done things differently, you may be blaming yourself, and you wonder if the immense darkness around you will ever change. Sometimes you even wonder if you want it to change.
Your grief is unique and will take its own journey. But if the immense weight of the pain has been debilitating and impairing your daily functioning, you may need help navigating your loss. I am here to help you.
How would you help me?
Your grief is heavy but while we're together, I can help you carry it. I want to learn about your loved one, I want to hear the things that are hard to share with others, the thoughts you wish you weren't having.
I won't tell you what to do or to move on. But I will offer you opportunities to process your hurt and navigate the variety of feelings you are experiencing. We will navigate how to deal with others, I will advocate for your needs with those that won't listen, and navigate the difficulties that are coming which you may not be aware of yet.
It feels too hard to get started. I don't think I can talk about this yet.
I understand. I'm ready when you are but I encourage you to come see me and share your story. We will go at your speed. I know that after our first meeting, you will feel strongly about continuing to process this with me.
I am searching for ways to help a family member, or a friend, with their grief. What can I do?
Your loved one is in pain, yes, but they do not need someone to rescue them out of it. They need to feel the loss, they need to take their time, and they need people around them to support the process. Please avoid common phrases like:: "God has a plan", "everything happens for a reason", "you just need to (fill in the blank) more", "you need to get over this", etc.
If you are struggling to support someone you love in their grief, the best practice is to be present, be silent, and be compassionate.
If you are struggling as you watch a loved on in their grief, I invite you to reach out for yourself as well.